I didn't think I was a killer. I used to think I did what I needed to because I had no choice.
But I did have choices. I could have gone to the food pantries that were set up. I didn't though because I hated the idea of being weak. I wanted to be strong in the face of all the bad things that were done to me. If that made me into a murderer then so be it but at least I still have a voice and agency when it comes to who I kill.
I even have my own rules. Standards make us who we are.
I don't know what feels right anymore but at least I don't hurt so much.
Not to worry. You'll learn in time, and you've always been a quick study - haven't you, little scholar?
Of course, don't feel as though you have to waste the meager effort needed to answer that. It's evident enough in the way you already grasp something that's so difficult for others to see - or that others are so eager to turn a blind eye to, at the least. The galaxy is filled with an endless multitude of weak souls who will simply lie down and accept a death decided for them by another's hand. You could have been one of them - but, of course, your will is stronger than that. That is precisely what has set you apart from so many others, even now. You're no fainthearted coward, desperate to pretend every breath we draw is anything but what it is: a choice.
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<a.dyer>
But I did have choices. I could have gone to the food pantries that were set up. I didn't though because I hated the idea of being weak. I wanted to be strong in the face of all the bad things that were done to me. If that made me into a murderer then so be it but at least I still have a voice and agency when it comes to who I kill.
I even have my own rules. Standards make us who we are.
I don't know what feels right anymore but at least I don't hurt so much.
<aeternus>
Of course, don't feel as though you have to waste the meager effort needed to answer that. It's evident enough in the way you already grasp something that's so difficult for others to see - or that others are so eager to turn a blind eye to, at the least.
The galaxy is filled with an endless multitude of weak souls who will simply lie down and accept a death decided for them by another's hand. You could have been one of them - but, of course, your will is stronger than that.
That is precisely what has set you apart from so many others, even now. You're no fainthearted coward, desperate to pretend every breath we draw is anything but what it is: a choice.